Techniques of Servitude by Ms. C. At times I find myself in the position to give advice to newcomers in the scene, or those who would like to make Dominance and submission their way of life. I have talked to other Dominants and submissives who have related "horror" stories concerning their attempts. I try to help these people with what I have learned through my experiences training slaves. I believe the biggest problem in trying to find an D/s relationship that works is communication. Dominants tend to use the same techniques on each slave, not stopping to realize they are individuals and respond differently. What works on one will not work on another. One slave's fear is another's turn-on, and that sort of thing. Also the slaves are afraid to speak up, sometimes justifiably so, when they realize something isn't working. I prefer to train serious submissives, not game players, and have devoted a good deal of my time in this way. I try to make it clear to them that submission means that the Dominant's wishes should come first. The slave should reply, "if it pleases You." However, this works only if the Dominant cares about the well being of her slave. This includes emotional as well as physical well-being. The serious live-in slave must be kept in good working order. In an atmosphere of caring dominance, the slaves will accept their preferences as secondary. The most important aspect of slave behavior is attitude. The attitude toward the Dominant should be one of respect. This is not automatic. It is necessary for the Dominant to teach the slave to respect her, whether the slave has prior experience or is a novice. Respect is taught in a variety of ways. I like to use formal classes, on the spot reinforcement and restrictive rules. I teach my slaves to kneel when serving me, to ask permission before eating and other small things that serve to remind them that they are being controlled. I put my slaves through a variety of patience tests. Some of these include holding position while being put under a blanket, wearing a straight jacket while attached to a bondage rack, having to do the same chore repeatedly without complaint. It is important to get to know the slave, knowledge of their mental make-up is necessary to train them effectively. I try to find out what really works on my slave as a punishment, not a fantasy game. Then I can use this to correct and enforce the proper attitude I expect. There are a number of levels of submission. They are not always clear, there is some over-lap, and experience can lead a submissive into a deeper level. I have separated these levels of submission into five types: the thrill-seeker, the prelude to straight (vanilla) sex, the once-in-a-while submissive, the temporary live-in, and the full-time slave. The thrill-seeker is just out to get as many different experiences in life as possible. They dabble in a wide range of interests. Usually this type is never heard from again when they find out a serious commitment is involved. This includes "collectors", submissives who just want to see how many Dominants they can write or meet. They usually never show up, which is just as well because they are so obnoxiously demanding that they are thrown out. This type also likes to call on the phone and hang up, or say rude things. They are the trouble makers of the scene and not worth anyone's time. The prelude to straight (vanilla) sex type of submissives just put up with what the Dominant is doing because they expect to have intercourse afterwards. They are doing it to get turned on enough to engage in ordinary sex. Like the thrill-seeker, the Dominant's efforts and wishes mean nothing to them. This is fantasy play best left to lovers or husbands and wives, rather than to serious Dominants. Of course, there are so-called professional Dominants who will cater to this type. This ruins the reputations of those of us who practice true domination. The once-in-a-while submissive usually leads an ordinary life, marriage, and so on. However, the need to submit to a Dominant Woman and be controlled exists. This type of submissive will engage in hourly training activities once or twice a month. Sometimes a lasting relationship will develop, with the submissive returning periodically for years. Minimal rules are learned and the submissive would prefer to receive sexual release of some sort. There are those that do not want the release, just the Domination. Masochists are often in this category, visiting when their need for painful release grows high. The temporary live-in submissive visits for an over-night, week-end or week. They are expected to carry out the duties of a live-in. Naturally, a thrill-seeker or submissive looking for straight sex is not going to be able to endure living as a live in. Neither is the hourly type of submissive. These types expect some sort of slave activity to be going on, catering to their fantasies twenty-four hours a day. When that does not happen, they are gone. It takes a determined Dominant to be able to handle the temporary live-in. If she treats him/her as a buddy or roommate when not in specific training activities, she will have more trouble that she wants to handle. Even the temporary live-ins must be made well aware that they are slaves at all times and are expected to behave like one. This requires a lot of work on the part of the Dominant. If she is not willing to put in the time and effort it takes, she will have slaves she cannot control. The full-time slave, like the temporary live-in, must live as a slave twenty-four hours a day. There are rules, restrictions, chores, being controlled completely. The live-in slaves must learn their place, and fast, if they are to last in the Dominant household. The live-in must learn that the Dominant will handle them as she pleases. It is best to discuss all these matters and try out a week-end or two before making the decision to try to be a live-in slave. The Dominant will make it clear what she expects. Unlike the temporary live-in who returns to family and job, the full-time slave is trying to make a permanent commitment. Honesty is another important aspect in a successful D/s relationship. Honesty leads to trust, without trust the relationship will not work. Sometimes it is difficult to be honest. However, it is just as important for the Dominant to be honest as it is for the submissive. A submissive should be honest when telling the Dominant what they are looking for in the relationship, the Dominant should be honest in why she wants this particular slave. Both should be honest in describing their previous experiences. It is always wise for the slave to be as truthful as possible, a dishonest slave is often dismissed. I use a variety of ways to test a slave's honesty. When it comes to previous experience, I sometimes call the Dominant in question. I do not feel competitive toward other Dominants. I prefer friendship. This is handy when checking up on a slave. Honesty can be threatened out of the slave. However, only if I know what will reach the slave as a threat. It ia amazing how stupid some slaves think a Dominant is when they are trying to get away with something. A well-put question or two can sometimes get to the truth. I do not let dishonesty go unpunished. If it is serious enough the slave is permanently banished. I have many exercises I put my slaves through to inspire submissiveness. Some of these include written assignments, essays, repetitions that I assign, submissive positions, ways to serve as a slave, taped lectures and repeater audio cassette drills, verbal humiliation, reminders of status, bondage, humiliation, intimidation techniques and discipline. I also use cage time, a variety of enemas, isolation and leash training as aids in submissiveness. Of course, not all of these techniques will create the proper attitude of submissiveness in any one slave. However, I have found that a good mix of these techniques, personalized to the particular slave, is very effective. It is not always easy to tell if I am getting through to the slave, if they are truly submissive or just going through the motions. Signs I look for are a consistent attitude of humility, a certain amount of shyness, obedience, no arguing, permission asking, doing things they have been taught without being reminded, cooperativeness during training and an air of happiness. The slave who is truly submissive seems happy while being submissive. If it seems forced, it usually is. The slave who is just going through the motions can't hold out forever and will slip sooner or later. However, even the most submissive slave will make mistakes. The trick is learning to distinguish the real attitude. Obedience is an important aspect of submission. The amount of obedience expected differs according to level of submission. Obviously I would not expect the same from an hourly that I would from a full-time live-in. However, no matter what the level of involvement is, a certain amount of obedience is necessary. I inspire obedience in my submissives in a variety of ways. Some of these include rules and restrictions, obedience training, commands, humiliation, the writing and signing of a slave contract of servitude, and certainty of punishment. I believe a Dominant should not threaten a punishment she does not intend to carry out. The slave should know this without a doubt. This is consistency, very important in training slaves. If the slave is not sure what will happen, then the disobedience becomes a risk they might decide to take. I try to be certain my idea of discipline and punishment are the same as the slave's. Discipline is both physical and intellectual, it is the means by which the slave is controlled. Discipline in thinking as well as actions. Discipline and punishment are similar in the physical respect because the tools of discipline are often used for punishment. However, the attitude of the Dominant makes the difference. If she is exerting her will through the use of implements in a firm but friendly manner, that is discipline. If she is cold, unfriendly, even angry while using the implements, that is punishment. Discipline is a means of control, while punishment is the result of misbehavior. In the true submissive, trying to gain the Mistress's pleasure is an act of obedience. My serious slaves work very hard to please me no matter what task I have assigned them. Poor efforts stem from lack of obedience. This is why I allow my slaves no excuses. There is no excuse for poor performance in slave duties. It is simple disobedience. Lack of proper obedience is a form of disrespect. The slave who does not obey me, does not respect me as a Dominant. That is why obedience is a serious aspect of servitude. Anything less is just a game. The tasks of servitude are many. No matter what level of submission I am dealing with, I require a certain amount of tasks. Tasks have no fetish value and are usually done for my convenience. I may have a postal slave do typing, or make photocopies. An hourly might be asked to stop and pick up something from the store. The errand (work-study) slave has a variety of tasks from taking me shopping to dropping off the laundry. Household tasks vary with the length of stay of the slave. An over-night may do dishes, take out the garbage, clean the pet area. A week-end or weekly temporary live-in may have a written schedule of chores, sharing them with my live-in slavegirl. A full-time live-in is taught all the various tasks I expect and is subject to inspection. Each slave is responsible to me for their own work, and no slave, no matter how short the stay, is treated as a houseguest. Another technique of servitude is training the slave to endure ordeals. An ordeal is a training activity that is composed of a series of tests, a learning experience for both the Dominant and submissive. A discipline ordeal is a series of administering physical discipline with a variety of implements. It is stronger in intensity than usual. Likewise, a bondage ordeal puts the slave through a series of difficult bondage situations. As part of my total control of my slaves, I sometimes put them through enema ordeals. As many as twelve in one day. I give the enemas in groups of three, each getting larger and to be held longer. Another type of ordeal is a humiliation ordeal. This involves a series of tasks , each designed to make my slave feel humiliation. Punishment ordeals, depending on the offense, can last up to forty-eight hours and are extremely difficult to endure. A variety of punishments are used, both physical and intellectual. A confusion ordeal is a collection of my confusion techniques intended to put the slave a little off-balance and foster greater dependence on me. The fear-of-abandonment ordeal can be carried out with a temporary dismissal, complete with rules and assignments, or an abandonment situation such as being kept locked away. Before I use such drastic measures, I usually make it understood with the slave what I intend to do. If the slave cannot handle it, the slave is dismissed. The purpose of using training ordeals is to make it clear to the slave who is in control. It is a way for me to exert my power over them, to see what they are able to endure for me. Ordeals are useful in testing and expanding a slave's limits. Also, ordeals are useful in testing the slave's sincerity. It is important for a slave to understand the concept of loyalty. A slave is expected to be loyal, see no one else, to the Mistress. A Dominant is loyal only to herself, that is her right as a Dominant. I expect my slaves to be loyal and I will punish them if I find out they are not loyal. There are different attitudes on just what loyalty is. I feel submitting to another Dominant, without my permission, for any reason is disloyalty. Writing, calling or talking to another Dominant without my permission is disloyalty. Disloyalty is a serious case of disrespect. It shows that the slave does not consider me as their Dominant. Therefore, I banish slaves who are disloyal. I believe a slave who is disloyal to me once, will be again, so no second chances. I do not care what they did before they submitted to me, that is in the past, I deal in the present. Another technique of servitude that shows the submissive their status is submitting to my feet. By this I mean using the slave as a footstool, using their body as furniture for my feet, "slave standing" on various parts of their body. Also foot worship, kissing the floor where I have stepped, foot massage, foot care and care of my high heels and boots all serve to illustrate slave status. A final aspect of servitude I wish to discuss is having my slaves serve my friends. At home there is a difference between serving as a maid would and submitting. Serving a drink to someone is not necessarily an act of submitting to them. It is simply obedience to my wishes. When a slave accompanies me to an S/M party they are required to serve me and anyone I choose. I instruct my slave beforehand in exactly what I expect from them. It takes much effort from both the Dominant and submissive to make an D/s relationship work. However, I find my lifestyle to be very satisfying.